Don’t know why the day has been so shit but truly it has! I’m off work, I’ve managed a lie-in & an afternoon nap, yet still the day was covered by that same flipping grey cloud (more like jet black).
After a very low day (worst part detailed below to my shame) I took Eastar for his evening stroll & couldn’t resist jumping on when we were almost home & I had someone to give me a leg-up. I had no bridal or saddle (just head collar & lead rope) & when I spotted Martin I asked for a leg-up (much to his horror.. on concrete with no hat too). I simply sat on Eastars bareback (ok & occasionally lolled around his neck) until he found his stable, which was sadly all too quick.
Another memorable point to the day (for less pleasant reason) was me finally blowing at Ellice! Geeez boy did I blow too, saying that it has been coming for sometime. I don’t smack & although I shout for not only Scotland British Isles too, rarely does anyone take any notice in this house. That was until today! Ohhh it’s been some years since I let rip like that & in truth I hope it’s many more years before my temper raises its ugly head again. I can honestly say I’m totally ashamed of myself for the way I went at her.
It all started with me moaning about 12 eggs not being cleaned or dated (they only lay 3 or 4 a day) which is such an old argument & her screaming back at me which was not the best move towards a woman on the edge. She screamed & ranted then finished with the “I hate you” statement as she stalked off to her room slamming doors (foolish route when it’s such a shit hole & another age old argument) of course like any “dog with a bone” I followed with not only steam, but great fucking flames streaming from every oraphis!
It ended with her room completely pulled out (bed etc all on landing) only leaving a massive pile of crap to sort in the middle of the floor (which filled the whole room may I add) & her sobbing like a brat after its first real reprimand! I went down & sobbed like a baby too before going off to chill with Eastar who totally settled my mood within seconds.
As ashamed as I am, I have to say that maybe it was needed! Ellice’s room is now cleaner than ever & Jamie has never moved so quick to simply clean/clear anything in sight to avoid my wrath being turned his way. I’m not proud of making my children scared of me (even if only for 5 mins) but maybe sometimes it’s needed? After all my parents could simply look & I would step into line! Why? Because I knew what was next if not (cane, slipper or simply a darn good wallop), yet mine seem to push & push because there is nothing after the shout…
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